Notice Me.

He just walked into the room and picked up all the trash in the room, lefted and returned with a chair to make the table even with chairs, and we make eye contact. Aniexty attack. He check the printer fer ink. No a word said but so many are running through my head. What should I say to him? Anything at all? Do I look like I'm focused on something really important on the computer. He's my RA. I have 4 and he's one of them so maybe flirting with him will be bad. But I like the sound of the challenge but I dont think i'll ever get the chance. He's too perfect, there has to be something thats not good about him. He wont open up to me, and I wonder why. I turn into this 7th grade girl and acting like a loser who cant stop stairing. Anyway, so another issue at hand, I need to stop saying "sorry" after I say something because I'm afriad that I'm offend or embasses myself. I do it on the phone with nick and I dont know why. Ill write something later, I think.. I'm really hungry I didnt eat anything at the shitty brunchh..

Tie Me Down

She aint gunna tie down. I love this song by New Boys. Im crazy hyper. I go to NHTI in Concord. NH. Its November 1st and i cant sleep. I had an okay day , I only got to talk to Nick Alexander Kling once today for about an hour when we're used to about three hours of talk time of 100 calls per day but its okay. He had to work and My friend needed me which ended the phone call. She bought me Wendy's so I guess it made up for it. So I dont know what everyone else thinks [air force ones by Nelly oldieee!] but i wanna move to Allen, TX where Nick is currently living and attending college. Now your thinking whats your age? 18 Why can't I move? Family? Friends? I havent met this man in my life but we've been talking since October of 05' so it's been a while so my family mostly just my brother at this point is not keene on the idea. I'm deff doing it this summer if not sooner. i dont have parents, my mom and dad both passed away in the two years. Along with my ex/best friend killing herself. All very hard and I guess that's why I got a blog so maybe i can get some of the feelings I feel out and I could sleep like a normal person. I'm actually tired now its almost 4 am but I'll keep up on thiss. I need to. Fer my sake.